Saturday, August 22, 2015

To Everything a Season

I'm actually having a hard time figuring out what to write here. After all, how do I sum up almost a year of life? What do I say? What do I leave out? The short answer is, there's no way to do it, but I'll try to hit the very highest of the highlights.

This past year has obviously been super-busy for me. I haven't posted anything for 10 months---and I would probably STILL be putting it off if I wasn't so determined not to hit the year mark. Those months were largely spent working and studying. If I wasn't at work, I was doing school, and it's pretty hard to spin that into great creative works of literature!

All the effort at school paid off when I graduated in May. It only took me 26 years to earn my AA, but I finally did it!  And I am SO glad to be taking a break from school for a while. Well, sort of a break. I'm taking one class this fall and another in the spring. Work has been good---I have never had a shortage of things to keep me busy there, that's for sure.

But all of that only tells you what's been happening on my outside. That's only half the story. This past year has also been the beginning of a journey---a quest to figure out what and WHO I am supposed to be now that I don't have kids at home.

See, I've been busy raising my kids for 19 years. 19 years! They say you build a habit in only 3 weeks, so almost 2 decades cuts a pretty deep pathway in the ol' neural tissue. My identity and purpose for my entire adult life has been very clear and easy to see. I am a parent. A mommy warrior. That's what I'm here for, that's what God has called me to do.

Only now, I'm not raising my kids. Yes, I still play a part in their lives, but it's a supporting role now---I'm not the main act anymore. That's an unfamiliar spot for me.

So I'm learning. Trying to figure out this whole "adult" thing. Figuring out who I am when I'm not on mommy duty. Wondering where the journey will lead and what God's purpose is for me now.

In the meantime, I'm trying to get back to some of the things that I like to do. Yes, life is still crazy busy, but I don't want to be a passive participant---I want to live a life that is intentional, at least some of the time! I can't spend my whole life vegging out on Facebook after work because I'm too tired to move. Which is why, the other day I finally stopped at an old house I've been wanting to photograph since I moved here 5 years ago.

It's a nice old ruin (not unlike what I feel like some of the time as I approach the big 4-0 in just a few more years), an old homesteader's cabin slowly losing the fight to remain upright. This particular day was a beautifully serendipitous meeting of a beautiful sunset at just the time I was driving by. Irresistible!

Finley was happy too, because we don't get to go adventuring as often as we used to

This is the view standing between the two buildings

Standing in the barn, or shed, or whatever it was

For the photographically minded, these two pictures were taken at the same time. On one I exposed for the building, and on the other I exposed for the sky. Two different effects, but both of them very pretty.

Solomon said "To everything, there is a season." Seasons change. Life changes. Things might look different tomorrow than they look today. But wherever life takes me, I can trust Him for the journey.